This morning while I was chanting, I got an image of myself behind myself - pushing the front one forward, holding it up like a puppet or clone. It struck me like a vivid dream that leaves a deep though ambiguous impression, and lingers...I thought that shadow clone was protecting me - that my true self was the one behind, becoming strong while that puppet in front suffered the damage. When I turned to look in the mirror, I saw that the puppet being sacrificed is me.
I made a vow last year around this time that continues to change my life. Because of it I am able to share my heart for better or worse, without apology. Every day I feel gratitude for this life, even though that old saying, "Be careful what you wish for, you might get it" holds true in a sense. To desire and pray for peace, love, acceptance, unity... that is easy and 'noble'. When the realization comes that I must become peace, love, acceptance and unity, the path becomes much more personal and challenging. There's no turning back here. Every time I embrace all of myself in that mirror instead of being split and sacrificed, I am living in the fulfillment of my desire. In those moments, I can look into your eyes and truly see my brother, my sister, my father and mother, my child, my friend, my self.
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