Privacy

I used to be obssessed with privacy. I hated anyone to know anything I didn't want them to. Then I had my privacy violated - with and without my knowledge in a plethora of ways that left me utterly confused, lost and in despair. I lost my faith in human beings - shocked that anyone would or could do the things that were done to me - that someone would actually choose on purpose to do those things to another living soul.

Over a long, long period of time I began to see and understand how that desperate quest for privacy was, in part, an effort to deny things I've done in my own life that I felt ashamed of. Because of my inability to accept myself, I practically opened the door to some truly horrible experiences and invited them right in. I share these things not with a feeling of bitterness or victimization, but in order to give voice to what I've learned in this long, sometimes painful journey that is not over yet.

I offer this in a spirit of fearlessness and peace because in my heart, there is nothing but compassion for myself and all of us on this journey through our lives. I still have fear about sharing myself, about moving forward, about trusting. The difference is now I know what is in my heart, who I am, that 'me' is someone I can trust.

If you are suffering in the darkness of confusion, pain, loss, fear... please know that my prayers are with you every day. From the depths of suffering endured in my own life, I know and am committed to the offering that no one should ever feel they are there alone.